Ilea Flores

Oral History Of Chasity

Chasity Barinas is a 30 year old wife and mother of three.She is puerto rican born and raised in new york city.She has a 10 year old son, 9 year old daughter, and 7 year old son. We sat together on a wet lazy sunday afternoon to discuss peer pressure and friendship. Through the whole interview you could here the children running around and fighting in the background.

To me what makes a good friendship is someone who does not pressure you in doing something you dont want to do. Not a hypocrite and talks behind your back, someone who cares about your well being.

Yes I have been pressures by friends. And yes I was pressured into something I didn't want to do.

I'll say both friends and family pressure the same. Some friends will tease you, call you names, not be your friend, talk about you, not like us because you didn't do what they said.

(Sighs) Some family would not listen to you, not care if you are here or there, with who or not. Emotional and physical abuse at home or lecture you to deaf you might rebel. Not a good role model in your own home. Wrong advice.

Now that I have children I'm aware hor friends or families could pressure you to do things you really do not want to do. Because I had experienced peer pressure myslef.

Well i never knew about what was peer pressure. My mom wasn;t educated about the topic. I was not explained or thaught about peer pressure in high school. I noticed that I went through it when my first child went to head start. In attending parents work shop.

One time while when I was in High School me and three of my friends where cutting school. We went to the school yard in area where no one could see us. Neither the security guard nor the teachers could see us. We also looked around for some students , once we knew that the area was clear one of my friends took out a cigarette then she started to pass it down, when it was suppose to be my turn I said no. I was scared, I never smoked a cigarette before. Then one of them said "Come on you're the only one who didn't smoke just take one puff. It's calming nothing is going to happen to you." So I gave in. I was afraid that if I didn't do what they said I wouldn't have any friends, which I already didn't have much of.

I started feeling more peer pressure once I started dating. I had a boyfriend who smoked marijuana, we started having sexual intercourse just because I couldn't decide for myself, and just because I wanted some one to love me, and care for me. Along the years I've learned alot, just by going to work shops. I also did my best to educate myslef as much as possible, so one day I could educate my children about peer pressure, and hopefully they would have more strenght than I did if they ever come across it.

Yes one of my friends pressured me. Back then I didn't know the reason. Now looking back she was a demanding person, she wanted me to do what she said just because she was jealsous of me. She wanted me to be like her, and if I didn't do what she said she would go behind my back and say horrible things about me. No im not friends with her anymore, after graduation i just didnt want to be around her anymore. I enrolled in a training program that kept me busy. there was a couple of times she had called my mom, but she said i moves to another state with my aunt.